Tuesday, June 30, 2009



You were subtle and caring,

And I loved you for it.
You pulled me up And showed me the light,

And I loved you for it.


You thought I was something

When the rest of the world
Didn’t think at all,

And I loved you for it.


You took the silver piece

Before I put it to my head,

Not knowing you had saved me,

Not knowing you had given me hope,

And I loved you for it.

You were everything I ever needed,

And you stumbled upon me,

Right out of the blue,

And helped me in more ways
than I could ever repay you for

And I loved you for it.

Sometimes I think I care,

Just a little too much.
Sometimes I think I dream,

Just because I know you’ll be in them,

Holding me in your arms.


Sometimes I think I hate,

Because I can never amount
To your perfection

And give you what you deserve.


Sometimes I think I cry,

Because I miss you,

But I know,

That I’m not good enough,


Not smart or pretty or strong enough.
Sometimes I think I love,
Because you showed me what it was,


You opened my heart,

You made it warm,

You threw away the shadows

And filtered out everything
I couldn’t stand.


And I loved you for it.

Run away...

“Sometimes…sometimes I think you wish it could have been me in front of that car instead.”
Me in front of that car.
You wish it could have been me.

The echoes followed me.
Her words resounding, pulsing in my ears, the rhythm matching my footsteps.

No.
No.
Yes.

Of course not.
It couldn’t be.
Could it?
What would I have done without you everyday?
You’ve helped me though so much.
Would things have been any different if it wasn’t you?

No.
No.
Yes.

It wouldn’t have.
It couldn’t have.
It would.
Of course.

I loved her.
I wanted so much to be with her.
And she was gone.
And now you’re here.
And I want to love you.
But she’s going to stand in the way.
Always.

And as much as it pains me to admit it.
As much as I want to scream
And cry
And deny it.
…you were right.

No.
No.
...yes.